Even though it looks harmonious, in fact these 4 signs show the relationship between mother and child is no longer healthy - OCSEHAT

Even though it looks harmonious, in fact these 4 signs show the relationship between mother and child is no longer healthy

Children are a time when you can be spoiled with the mother. Over time, you will change to become more independent and mature. Of course, the relationship that you establish with the mother also becomes more mature. Unfortunately, there are still many adults who are stuck with relationships like "the little one and the mother". This kind of relationship turns out to be unhealthy in building a harmonious family.

Is your relationship with mother really really good? Try to make sure the relationship between the child and mother is good like what, with the following review.

Sign of relationship between unhealthy child and mother

What is the relationship between a healthy mother and child? Healthy relationships are described by children and mothers who understand each other's boundaries. If the child or mother is still stuck with their old role, this indicates that the bond that is built is not a healthy relationship.

Reporting from the Huff Post, Tina B. Tessina, a psychotherapist and author of a book called It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction, explained her opinion on this matter.

"Most children are very dependent on their mother, so it's not easy for the mother or child to release the bond. However, a mother needs to learn how to support children to become independent adults, and children also have to let go of feelings of dependence and learn to be more independent ", Tessina said.

Some things that indicate an unhealthy relationship between a child and mother include:

1. Your mother's attention is too excessive

Communication via cellphone can bring the relationship closer together. However, it can also be a destructive relationship between mother and child. How come? Mothers who call their children to just ask "have eaten, not yet?" Or "have gone home, work?" Too often, it turns out that it can disrupt a child's life. This feels less appropriate if done at any time, right?

Actually your mother may contact you via cellphone. However, choose the appropriate situation and time. For example, when you are sick, work breaks, or when there is news that is important and cannot be postponed to be notified.

To overcome this, you need to set a time back and provide special time with family. So, your business with friends and work is not disturbed.

2. Again and again lying to the mother

You who feel you are an adult, definitely want to spend a lot of time hanging out with friends. Unfortunately, you are still afraid to ask permission and think that your vacation plan with friends is not approved. Be, you are looking for other reasonable reasons to cover up the lie.

Even though your mother at that time didn't know what you were hiding. Gradually, the lie could have been revealed. This will certainly hurt your mother, right? Remember, having a good and healthy relationship must prioritize honesty. Being bright will foster trust in each other and make the relationship tighter.

The solution, be a bolder person. Whatever the problem is if you convey something well to your mother. Surely your mother will listen carefully and give consideration to you.

3. Let the mother handle things that should be your obligation

Being an adult must be mentally and physically capable of doing something. For example, washing your own clothes, tidying up your room, or making an appointment with a doctor for a routine health check.

You can handle it all by yourself. You may ask your mother for help, but when you are really in an urgent situation. If this continues, how can you become independent and smart to take care of yourself?

For this reason, you need to evaluate what your obligations are at home that you have or have not done. Smart set time and enough rest, so a solution so you can do various things yourself.

4. Mothers too interfere when you want to make a decision

Life is full of choices. This is a challenge for those of you who are growing up. The step to becoming an adult is to be able to choose the best and dare to face the consequences.

Unfortunately, there are still many parents who often interfere with children's decisions. For example, the decision to choose a college major. Although, parents contribute to the cost of education, parents must consider the desires and abilities of children.

Do not let the child undergo a forced choice. This will most likely make the child depressed and the results are not satisfactory. This condition certainly makes the relationship between child and mother and other family members do not get along.

As an adult, you must be able to choose a decision. However, don't forget to accept input from other people, including your mother, father, and also your friends.

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